
Falling in love is pleasurable and being in love is difficult. The transition period is what tells you how strong your feelings are for that person. With him, I just fell in love without giving much thought about anything. I wish I had the capacity to love people unconditionally. The course of time that I spent with him was not selfless. That is the predicament with relationships. It is a whole package of selfish desires. People lie when they say their relationship is unconditional. It cannot be. Relationship is a fabricated word for narcissism. "Give me attention", "Give me time", "You are mine" and so on.
Do I feel like listening to his voice? Yes. I want to talk to him, feel his warmth and tell him that I love him. But again, that would ruin everything. We parted, for good. At least I would like to think it was for good. What we had was beautiful and untarnished. I broke up with him knowing that this major part of me will be gone forever and the level of commitment that I had with him will never happen again. And we did, parted ways and I miss him.
A friend of mine once told me that every time you miss someone special, send some light to that person I don't necessarily have to call or text him asking his well being. That would be chaotic. All I can do is wish him luck and happiness.
Darling, I really miss you. Hope you are happy. I will love you, always.
That is all I guess. This will stay, forever and beyond.
Infinities of love.